Five Rules For Life is entering the twelfth month of operation, and participation and readership continue to increase. As we close out the first year, the site is on its way to the "150 submissions posted" milestone. Make sure you submit your "Five Rules" today!
Many thanks to all the supporters who have helped promote the site - I appreciate the links and positive feedback. And many more thanks to those who have submitted their rules - it is continued participation from the readers that will keep the site fresh and interesting.
Remember...if you get value from reading other people's rules, submit your own and return the favor!
Thanks again, and I hope you will continue to read and spread the word.
> tell a friend
> post a link
> send a "tweet"
Regards,
Jon
PS - the best way to be notified of new submissions is to subscribe to the site; do so via RSS reader or email. And add me on Facebook (make sure you tell me you are a "Five Rules" reader or I may not accept!).
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Featured Five Rules of The Week - January 4th, 2010
The Featured "Five Rules" of the Week is selected by the editor, possibly with input from random strangers. The criteria is simple - I [we] liked it.
editor's note - since a lot of people's New Year's resolutions include working out and getting fit, I thought this was a good choice for the beginning of 2010.
The featured contributor for the week of January 4th, 2010 is Terry Shannon:
terry shannon is a personal trainer and fitness nut. he offers the following advice:
"I make my living helping people get fit, but in reality you don't need me. You can do it all yourself if you just follow a few basic rules."
Here are Terry's "Five Rules For Life":
1.) Eat what you want - in moderation.
You want a cheeseburger? Go ahead and eat it. You want a chocolate bar? No problem. You don't have to go on a restrictive "only eat A, B, and C" type diet as long as you eat in moderation. There is a big difference between having a cheeseburger and fries once a week, and going to McDonalds every day. There is a big difference between eating a candy bar every now and then, and eating one twice a day...or worse yet, as a meal replacement. Eat what you love, just do it in moderation. And mix in salads, smoothies, and other healthy meals.
2.) You have everything you need to exercise right now.
Many people put off exercising because they don't have the right equipment. They say:
- "I'll join a gym next month."
- "I'll get a new bike in May."
- "I need to get a new pair of shoes or some work-out clothes first."
It is nothing more than procrastination. You can drop down right now and do ten push-ups. You can do ten squats. You can go outside and walk or jog, or find a bar and do ten pull-ups. You don't need fancy equipment, a big gym, or new clothes. Squats, push-ups, and pull-ups are body weight exercises that will impact your body as much as - if not more than - all the expensive equipment in any gym. Stop waiting on external things to happen before you make internal changes.
3.) Visualize who you want to be.
People underestimate the power of visualization. If you hold a picture of who you want to be in your mind and focus on it - what you look like, what you feel like, how you act, what you say, what you do...the person you want to be down to the smallest detail - you will naturally move towards and evolve into that person.
4.) Fixing your mind is as important as fixing your body.
What is "fixing your mind"? It means ridding yourself of the negative thinking, the bad attitude, and the destructive self-image. Visualizing - as mentioned above - is key. Surrounding yourself with positive people and focusing on positive information (turn off the nightly news!) is critical. And even if your body is not how you want it to be, revel in the fact that you are improving day by day doing #1 - #3 above.
5.) Take the first step, and don't stop once you do.
I could have said "just do it", or "take action". What is important is to start. Can you do twenty push-ups right now? Maybe not, but you can probably do a few sets of five. And if you do that every day, in about a week you will be able to do twenty. And then thirty. And then fifty. Have a salad or a smoothie every day; at first you may not notice a change, but after a week or two you will have more energy and your clothes will fit a little better. There is an old proverb that says "every journey starts with a single step"...take the first step, and don't stop once you do.
Terry currently resides in Phoenix, Arizona.
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Check back next week for a new Featured "Five Rules" of the Week.
Check out the new compilation post - "Five Rules For Life" - editor's choice.
And, watch the video here.
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editor's note - since a lot of people's New Year's resolutions include working out and getting fit, I thought this was a good choice for the beginning of 2010.
The featured contributor for the week of January 4th, 2010 is Terry Shannon:
terry shannon is a personal trainer and fitness nut. he offers the following advice:
"I make my living helping people get fit, but in reality you don't need me. You can do it all yourself if you just follow a few basic rules."
Here are Terry's "Five Rules For Life":
1.) Eat what you want - in moderation.
You want a cheeseburger? Go ahead and eat it. You want a chocolate bar? No problem. You don't have to go on a restrictive "only eat A, B, and C" type diet as long as you eat in moderation. There is a big difference between having a cheeseburger and fries once a week, and going to McDonalds every day. There is a big difference between eating a candy bar every now and then, and eating one twice a day...or worse yet, as a meal replacement. Eat what you love, just do it in moderation. And mix in salads, smoothies, and other healthy meals.
2.) You have everything you need to exercise right now.
Many people put off exercising because they don't have the right equipment. They say:
- "I'll join a gym next month."
- "I'll get a new bike in May."
- "I need to get a new pair of shoes or some work-out clothes first."
It is nothing more than procrastination. You can drop down right now and do ten push-ups. You can do ten squats. You can go outside and walk or jog, or find a bar and do ten pull-ups. You don't need fancy equipment, a big gym, or new clothes. Squats, push-ups, and pull-ups are body weight exercises that will impact your body as much as - if not more than - all the expensive equipment in any gym. Stop waiting on external things to happen before you make internal changes.
3.) Visualize who you want to be.
People underestimate the power of visualization. If you hold a picture of who you want to be in your mind and focus on it - what you look like, what you feel like, how you act, what you say, what you do...the person you want to be down to the smallest detail - you will naturally move towards and evolve into that person.
4.) Fixing your mind is as important as fixing your body.
What is "fixing your mind"? It means ridding yourself of the negative thinking, the bad attitude, and the destructive self-image. Visualizing - as mentioned above - is key. Surrounding yourself with positive people and focusing on positive information (turn off the nightly news!) is critical. And even if your body is not how you want it to be, revel in the fact that you are improving day by day doing #1 - #3 above.
5.) Take the first step, and don't stop once you do.
I could have said "just do it", or "take action". What is important is to start. Can you do twenty push-ups right now? Maybe not, but you can probably do a few sets of five. And if you do that every day, in about a week you will be able to do twenty. And then thirty. And then fifty. Have a salad or a smoothie every day; at first you may not notice a change, but after a week or two you will have more energy and your clothes will fit a little better. There is an old proverb that says "every journey starts with a single step"...take the first step, and don't stop once you do.
Terry currently resides in Phoenix, Arizona.
______________________________
Check back next week for a new Featured "Five Rules" of the Week.
Check out the new compilation post - "Five Rules For Life" - editor's choice.
And, watch the video here.
______________________________
Submitted by Chris Elliott
chris helps small businesses figure out what their big idea is, how to get it to market, and how to get people to notice their wonderfulness. he is also a dynamic speaker and trainer in personal growth and public speaking. you can catch him blogging at "as a dude thinketh".
Here are Chris' "Five Rules For Life":
1.) Eat the baby octopuses.
It frustrates me when dining companions turn up their noses at foods they have never tried because it "looks gross", "is slimy", or they are a "meat and potatoes person." A huge component of success is trying and learning new things, so when someone is not willing to try a new experience it says a lot about their potential for success.
2.) Shut up.
I am a firm believer that if your mouth is moving, you are not learning anything. When you dominate a conversation, you demonstrate that you will dominate the relationship. Being successful in personal and business relationships is about listening to what the other person is saying, and then responding to them without judgment.
3.) Execute.
There are millions of successful dreamers in the world, but the people that get recognized are those that execute their dream to make success happen. You don’t have to be the smartest, the wealthiest, or the most creative to be successful. You just have to take the ideas you have and turn them into actions that you execute to their completion.
4.) Be patient.
Life can sometimes put us into a frenzy where we are always trying to get more faster. This manifests itself by making us impatient, pushy, and rude. We must try to relax and realize that not everything can happen this instant, so we should enjoy the moment, be patient, and don’t try to rush life.
5.) Never stop learning.
Life is a learning adventure. We should try to capture every learning opportunity and not shut off new ideas, experiences, and adventures. We can learn from books, articles, people, classes, and experiences. When we recognize how great the adventure of life can be, every moment can be spent learning something new about the world.
Chris currently resides in Ohio.
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Here are Chris' "Five Rules For Life":
1.) Eat the baby octopuses.
It frustrates me when dining companions turn up their noses at foods they have never tried because it "looks gross", "is slimy", or they are a "meat and potatoes person." A huge component of success is trying and learning new things, so when someone is not willing to try a new experience it says a lot about their potential for success.
2.) Shut up.
I am a firm believer that if your mouth is moving, you are not learning anything. When you dominate a conversation, you demonstrate that you will dominate the relationship. Being successful in personal and business relationships is about listening to what the other person is saying, and then responding to them without judgment.
3.) Execute.
There are millions of successful dreamers in the world, but the people that get recognized are those that execute their dream to make success happen. You don’t have to be the smartest, the wealthiest, or the most creative to be successful. You just have to take the ideas you have and turn them into actions that you execute to their completion.
4.) Be patient.
Life can sometimes put us into a frenzy where we are always trying to get more faster. This manifests itself by making us impatient, pushy, and rude. We must try to relax and realize that not everything can happen this instant, so we should enjoy the moment, be patient, and don’t try to rush life.
5.) Never stop learning.
Life is a learning adventure. We should try to capture every learning opportunity and not shut off new ideas, experiences, and adventures. We can learn from books, articles, people, classes, and experiences. When we recognize how great the adventure of life can be, every moment can be spent learning something new about the world.
Chris currently resides in Ohio.
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Happy Holidays!
Best wishes for the holidays - and remember, nothing says giving like telling someone about "Five Rules For Life"!
Submitted by Kylie Philips
kylie philips works in an office but loves the outdoors. she lives with her husband and three cats, and her hobbies include writing (visit her blog here), photography, cycling, and drawing.
Here are Kylie's "Five Rules For Life":
1.) Laugh daily.
I spent many years living in a loveless and laughless home. One thing I have learned is that no matter what life throws at you, being able to laugh is one of the keys to happiness and a sense of overall wellness. Learning to laugh at the little things has been key to being able to move forward in my life.
2.) Love openly and honestly.
Such a hard one to learn. If you don’t love with honesty you are living a half life. Tell those you care about how you feel. Love with your whole heart. Don’t hold back. And in return you will allow that same love to be reciprocated.
3.) Respect.
Treat others with the same respect that you would like to be treated with. From your "nearest and dearest" to the check-out chick at the store. Everyone is a human with feelings and deserves respect. I have found that if you give respect, you will get respect.
4.) Own your actions.
This is about accepting responsibility for your actions, whether they are actions you are proud of or actions you are ashamed of. I spent many years blaming other people for all the problems and dramas in my life, but when I started to take some responsibility for my actions, my life became less drama-filled. From the smallest action of the day (what time you get out of bed, what you put into your mouth) to what you say, to the biggest of decisions – own your actions. If you are ashamed of them, learn and don’t repeat them – but still own it.
5.) Believe in Karma.
I believe that what you put out to the universe is what you will get back from it. Therefore it is important to live your life in a way that honors this. If you don’t want an action or attitude directed at you, don’t direct it at others.
Kylie currently resides in Adelaide, Australia.
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Here are Kylie's "Five Rules For Life":
1.) Laugh daily.
I spent many years living in a loveless and laughless home. One thing I have learned is that no matter what life throws at you, being able to laugh is one of the keys to happiness and a sense of overall wellness. Learning to laugh at the little things has been key to being able to move forward in my life.
2.) Love openly and honestly.
Such a hard one to learn. If you don’t love with honesty you are living a half life. Tell those you care about how you feel. Love with your whole heart. Don’t hold back. And in return you will allow that same love to be reciprocated.
3.) Respect.
Treat others with the same respect that you would like to be treated with. From your "nearest and dearest" to the check-out chick at the store. Everyone is a human with feelings and deserves respect. I have found that if you give respect, you will get respect.
4.) Own your actions.
This is about accepting responsibility for your actions, whether they are actions you are proud of or actions you are ashamed of. I spent many years blaming other people for all the problems and dramas in my life, but when I started to take some responsibility for my actions, my life became less drama-filled. From the smallest action of the day (what time you get out of bed, what you put into your mouth) to what you say, to the biggest of decisions – own your actions. If you are ashamed of them, learn and don’t repeat them – but still own it.
5.) Believe in Karma.
I believe that what you put out to the universe is what you will get back from it. Therefore it is important to live your life in a way that honors this. If you don’t want an action or attitude directed at you, don’t direct it at others.
Kylie currently resides in Adelaide, Australia.
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Submitted by Cheryl Hitchcock
cheryl hitchcock is a certified clinical counselor and spiritual life coach. she has been practicing for over thirteen years and now runs her own business. her recently penned book "just give your head a shake…and change your life for the better" is a guide for those seeking to manifest their own magnificence in life.
Here are Cheryl's "Five Rules For Life":
1.) It is better to be kind than to be right.
Let go of your ego's need to be right and justified. Given the choice (and you always have a choice) to be right about something and possibly sever a relationship, always choose to be kind. Kindness will always bring you what your spirit needs.
2.) Happiness is a state of mind.
We should be cultivating happiness as a way of being rather than a goal to be attained through external needs. When you cultivate happiness as a state of being it shines through you and nothing can derail your inner sense of well being.
3.) We are all equal, we just know and do different things.
Really 99.9% of our cells are the same. It's only .1% that makes us different. If we all could understand that we truly are all equal we may just treat each other with greater love. We may look different or do or know different things; this is what makes us unique but also what makes the world an exciting place. No one is better or worse than anyone else. It's our behaviors that dictate how we are viewed by others.
4.) Still your mind and know your path.
By stilling the endless chatter in our minds and connecting to our true spirit we will connect with our Dharma or path in life. Stilling the mind is the best way to connect with our inner guide and how we truly know what we are here to do.
5.) Awareness is the key to higher consciousness.
In order to connect with spirit and understand and eliminate negative behaviors we first need to be aware of how we are in this world and how we connect with others. You can't change something if you are not aware of its existence. This is true of our behaviors as well. When we are aware, we can then receive guidance from spirit and gain higher consciousness in order to change that which is not working in our lives.
Cheryl currently resides in Toronto, Ontario.
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Here are Cheryl's "Five Rules For Life":
1.) It is better to be kind than to be right.
Let go of your ego's need to be right and justified. Given the choice (and you always have a choice) to be right about something and possibly sever a relationship, always choose to be kind. Kindness will always bring you what your spirit needs.
2.) Happiness is a state of mind.
We should be cultivating happiness as a way of being rather than a goal to be attained through external needs. When you cultivate happiness as a state of being it shines through you and nothing can derail your inner sense of well being.
3.) We are all equal, we just know and do different things.
Really 99.9% of our cells are the same. It's only .1% that makes us different. If we all could understand that we truly are all equal we may just treat each other with greater love. We may look different or do or know different things; this is what makes us unique but also what makes the world an exciting place. No one is better or worse than anyone else. It's our behaviors that dictate how we are viewed by others.
4.) Still your mind and know your path.
By stilling the endless chatter in our minds and connecting to our true spirit we will connect with our Dharma or path in life. Stilling the mind is the best way to connect with our inner guide and how we truly know what we are here to do.
5.) Awareness is the key to higher consciousness.
In order to connect with spirit and understand and eliminate negative behaviors we first need to be aware of how we are in this world and how we connect with others. You can't change something if you are not aware of its existence. This is true of our behaviors as well. When we are aware, we can then receive guidance from spirit and gain higher consciousness in order to change that which is not working in our lives.
Cheryl currently resides in Toronto, Ontario.
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Submitted by Analiese Marie
analiese marie is a blogger, yogini, bibliophile, and grant writer for an art museum in washington, dc. you can read her writing on her blog - tulips and tea - and follow her on twitter.
Here are Analiese's "Five Rules For Life":
1.) Believe that you are extraordinary.
The world desperately hungers for our gifts. Recognize yours, and live your life as if the fate of humanity depends upon your personal contribution (it does). Extraordinary people are not more talented or intelligent than the rest of us. They are extraordinary because they believe they are, and they act accordingly.
2.) In any given conversation, do 80% of the listening and 20% of the talking.
If you adhere to this principle, four things will happen. You will learn a lot. You will be forced to choose your words carefully and say more with less. People will think of you as a good listener, and they will like you more. And when you do speak, they will pay close attention.
3.) Practice yoga.
It will transform your life.
4.) Be your own hero.
Much of our pain is caused by our belief that happiness depends on something external to us. The day you realize that you and you alone are responsible for the quality of your life is the day you become free.
5.) Never stop learning.
Feed your mind with a steady stream of fresh knowledge and ideas. Take a class. Interview someone you admire. Learn a foreign language. Read...a lot. Challenge yourself intellectually. If you continue to learn, you'll never be boring and you'll never be bored.
Analiese currently resides in Washington, DC.
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Here are Analiese's "Five Rules For Life":
1.) Believe that you are extraordinary.
The world desperately hungers for our gifts. Recognize yours, and live your life as if the fate of humanity depends upon your personal contribution (it does). Extraordinary people are not more talented or intelligent than the rest of us. They are extraordinary because they believe they are, and they act accordingly.
2.) In any given conversation, do 80% of the listening and 20% of the talking.
If you adhere to this principle, four things will happen. You will learn a lot. You will be forced to choose your words carefully and say more with less. People will think of you as a good listener, and they will like you more. And when you do speak, they will pay close attention.
3.) Practice yoga.
It will transform your life.
4.) Be your own hero.
Much of our pain is caused by our belief that happiness depends on something external to us. The day you realize that you and you alone are responsible for the quality of your life is the day you become free.
5.) Never stop learning.
Feed your mind with a steady stream of fresh knowledge and ideas. Take a class. Interview someone you admire. Learn a foreign language. Read...a lot. Challenge yourself intellectually. If you continue to learn, you'll never be boring and you'll never be bored.
Analiese currently resides in Washington, DC.
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Submitted by Lori Deschene
lori deschene runs seeinggood.com, a blog about realistic positive thinking; she also contributes to the site tinybuddha.com. she’s currently one of the finalists in the sam-e.com "good mood bloggger" contest. you can help her win her dream blogging job by voting for her here.
...editor's note - Lori included the following with her submission:
"When I first sat down to write this piece, I wrote "Live without rules" five times, each followed by a reason to keep your approach to life flexible. The way you live is largely a reflection of where you’ve been, who you’ve been, and the beliefs you’ve formed. Who am I to create a cookie-cutter hard-and-fast code that makes sense for everyone?
That’s when I realized I’d need to make a sixth rule to introduce these ideas: judge my words, and anyone else’s against your own reason and moral code.
Buddha said, “Believe nothing, no matter where you read it, or who said it, no matter if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and common sense.”
The Dalai Lama echoed that sentiment with, “The ultimate authority must always rest with the individual’s own reason and critical analysis.”
Be critical. I invite it. These ideas help me, and they may or may not help you.
With that, here are five guidelines that have helped me feel happy, fulfilled, and meaningful."
Here are Lori's "Five Rules Guidelines For Life":
1.) Be honest with yourself.
One of the most valuable skills you’ll learn in life is the ability to call yourself out when you’re playing it safe because you’re scared to fail, or maybe even scared to succeed; or you’re closing off your heart because you’re afraid of being hurt. In the moment it feels comforting. You can do what you always did, and not push yourself into unfamiliar territory. But we tend to regret the things we didn’t do more than the things we did. Don’t lie to yourself about your instincts or motivations. It may feel safe in the moment, but it will one day grow into regret about who you could have become.
2.) Let yourself be vulnerable.
I once felt there was nothing more terrifying than letting go of control. I held a tight grip on who I really was because I wanted to shape other people’s perceptions of me. I had a very limited list of approved adjectives: smart, kind, talented, successful, awesome. I don’t love knowing someone may form a different opinion of me. But it’s liberating to honor where I’m at in any moment, and let people decide for themselves what they think about that. When you’re willing to be seen as someone who makes mistakes and has flaws, you’re essentially telling yourself being human isn’t something to be ashamed of. People may sometimes form judgments. But they’ll respect your authenticity, and they may learn to let go a little themselves—something that can be a tremendous relief.
3.) Live in accordance with your values.
Everyone has a different idea of what’s important, and what it means to be a good person. If you try to align your life with someone else’s values, you’ll likely feel unfulfilled. If your main source of joy is spending time with your family, would it really make sense to take on a high-paying job that limits the time you can spend with them? Make a list of the cornerstones of your happiness, and then take an honest inventory of your current situation. Does it parallel the priorities you listed?
4.) See as much as you can of what’s right in front of you.
People often live life caught in two mental strongholds: regret for the past, and worry for the future. In looking back on the years I’ve lived so far, I know I’ve spent more time engaging in those activities than truly being present. Whenever I catch myself, I check in with my five senses and experience what’s in front of me as fully as I possibly can. I notice the details. Hear the sounds. And seep into the moment. I know I won’t do this all the time, but it adds up to create more time truly living in the now.
5.) Treat yourself like you want other people to treat you.
It happens all the time. You don’t get a job, you start reviewing all your failures. You hurt a friend, you start beating yourself up. We make mistakes, and we always will. As long as you acknowledge them, make amends as best you can, and learn from them there’s no reason to stop treating yourself with kindness. Other people will take their cue from you. You decide how you deserve to be treated.
Lori currently resides in the San Francisco Bay Area.
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...editor's note - Lori included the following with her submission:
"When I first sat down to write this piece, I wrote "Live without rules" five times, each followed by a reason to keep your approach to life flexible. The way you live is largely a reflection of where you’ve been, who you’ve been, and the beliefs you’ve formed. Who am I to create a cookie-cutter hard-and-fast code that makes sense for everyone?
That’s when I realized I’d need to make a sixth rule to introduce these ideas: judge my words, and anyone else’s against your own reason and moral code.
Buddha said, “Believe nothing, no matter where you read it, or who said it, no matter if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and common sense.”
The Dalai Lama echoed that sentiment with, “The ultimate authority must always rest with the individual’s own reason and critical analysis.”
Be critical. I invite it. These ideas help me, and they may or may not help you.
With that, here are five guidelines that have helped me feel happy, fulfilled, and meaningful."
Here are Lori's "Five Rules Guidelines For Life":
1.) Be honest with yourself.
One of the most valuable skills you’ll learn in life is the ability to call yourself out when you’re playing it safe because you’re scared to fail, or maybe even scared to succeed; or you’re closing off your heart because you’re afraid of being hurt. In the moment it feels comforting. You can do what you always did, and not push yourself into unfamiliar territory. But we tend to regret the things we didn’t do more than the things we did. Don’t lie to yourself about your instincts or motivations. It may feel safe in the moment, but it will one day grow into regret about who you could have become.
2.) Let yourself be vulnerable.
I once felt there was nothing more terrifying than letting go of control. I held a tight grip on who I really was because I wanted to shape other people’s perceptions of me. I had a very limited list of approved adjectives: smart, kind, talented, successful, awesome. I don’t love knowing someone may form a different opinion of me. But it’s liberating to honor where I’m at in any moment, and let people decide for themselves what they think about that. When you’re willing to be seen as someone who makes mistakes and has flaws, you’re essentially telling yourself being human isn’t something to be ashamed of. People may sometimes form judgments. But they’ll respect your authenticity, and they may learn to let go a little themselves—something that can be a tremendous relief.
3.) Live in accordance with your values.
Everyone has a different idea of what’s important, and what it means to be a good person. If you try to align your life with someone else’s values, you’ll likely feel unfulfilled. If your main source of joy is spending time with your family, would it really make sense to take on a high-paying job that limits the time you can spend with them? Make a list of the cornerstones of your happiness, and then take an honest inventory of your current situation. Does it parallel the priorities you listed?
4.) See as much as you can of what’s right in front of you.
People often live life caught in two mental strongholds: regret for the past, and worry for the future. In looking back on the years I’ve lived so far, I know I’ve spent more time engaging in those activities than truly being present. Whenever I catch myself, I check in with my five senses and experience what’s in front of me as fully as I possibly can. I notice the details. Hear the sounds. And seep into the moment. I know I won’t do this all the time, but it adds up to create more time truly living in the now.
5.) Treat yourself like you want other people to treat you.
It happens all the time. You don’t get a job, you start reviewing all your failures. You hurt a friend, you start beating yourself up. We make mistakes, and we always will. As long as you acknowledge them, make amends as best you can, and learn from them there’s no reason to stop treating yourself with kindness. Other people will take their cue from you. You decide how you deserve to be treated.
Lori currently resides in the San Francisco Bay Area.
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Happy Thanksgiving!
To my American readers, I hope you enjoyed your holiday. And to everyone, a personal thanks for reading the site and contributing your "Five Rules". I will resume posting new submissions next week.
In the meantime, if you are feeling generous on this Thanksgiving day, I would appreciate you telling a few people about the site who might not already know about it. Whether it is through email, Twitter, or Facebook, I appreciate your help in spreading the word!
In the meantime, if you are feeling generous on this Thanksgiving day, I would appreciate you telling a few people about the site who might not already know about it. Whether it is through email, Twitter, or Facebook, I appreciate your help in spreading the word!
Submitted by Anna DiTommaso
anna ditommaso is a 20-year old college student majoring in graphic design. in her spare time she enjoys playing guitar, watching baseball, and reading.
Here are Anna's "Five Rules For Life":
1.) Treat people right.
Listen, care, use your manners, and don’t objectify people. Remember:
"The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good." - Samuel Johnson
2.) Work on yourself daily.
Be who you want you to be. When you learn to love yourself, it will be impossible for others not to.
3.) Protect your name.
It is your brand and identity - don’t let it be associated with anything you won’t be proud of.
4.) Be where you are supposed to be, when you are supposed to be there.
With your loved ones or friends who need you - you will know. Just show up. Don’t make them ask.
5.) Have something to do that takes you out of yourself.
Have at least one hobby or passion. Be a part of something that could exist entirely without you.
Anna currently resides in Texas.
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Here are Anna's "Five Rules For Life":
1.) Treat people right.
Listen, care, use your manners, and don’t objectify people. Remember:
"The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good." - Samuel Johnson
2.) Work on yourself daily.
Be who you want you to be. When you learn to love yourself, it will be impossible for others not to.
3.) Protect your name.
It is your brand and identity - don’t let it be associated with anything you won’t be proud of.
4.) Be where you are supposed to be, when you are supposed to be there.
With your loved ones or friends who need you - you will know. Just show up. Don’t make them ask.
5.) Have something to do that takes you out of yourself.
Have at least one hobby or passion. Be a part of something that could exist entirely without you.
Anna currently resides in Texas.
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Submitted by Nicole C.
nicole c. is an unemployed adolescent English teacher. she volunteers with a youth group in her area and directs a "counselor in training" program during the summer at her local ymca. her rules come from the core values of the ymca, and she truly believes in what she teaches.
Here are Nicole's "Five Rules For Life":
1.) Care.
When one cares for another - whether it be another person or one's environment - it always brings positivity to the world. Volunteering or helping a friend are all caring acts. Anything that makes another's heart bigger also makes yours bigger.
2.) Tell the truth.
Being honest is always the right way to be. When one is honest with others, he or she is also honest with him or herself. I've heard it said, "if you are always honest, you never have to remember anything."
3.) Be respectful.
When you respect yourself, your environment, and others you are also respected. I have found that when you listen to others and are respectful to them, they in turn will respect you. Be a respectable human being. Make others want to be around you.
4.) Be responsible.
You are responsible for you. When I was little and sad about a fight I had with my sister, my Mom always told me that I am only in charge of MY actions and MY thoughts. Experiences are only experiences when you allow yourself to learn from them...but you are responsible for your own learning.
5.) Be kind to your environment.
Be kind not only to the trees and the grass but be kind to everything around you. Be kind to your home and clean up after yourself. Be kind to the friends that are around you and be kind to your family.
Nicole currently resides on Long Island, New York.
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Here are Nicole's "Five Rules For Life":
1.) Care.
When one cares for another - whether it be another person or one's environment - it always brings positivity to the world. Volunteering or helping a friend are all caring acts. Anything that makes another's heart bigger also makes yours bigger.
2.) Tell the truth.
Being honest is always the right way to be. When one is honest with others, he or she is also honest with him or herself. I've heard it said, "if you are always honest, you never have to remember anything."
3.) Be respectful.
When you respect yourself, your environment, and others you are also respected. I have found that when you listen to others and are respectful to them, they in turn will respect you. Be a respectable human being. Make others want to be around you.
4.) Be responsible.
You are responsible for you. When I was little and sad about a fight I had with my sister, my Mom always told me that I am only in charge of MY actions and MY thoughts. Experiences are only experiences when you allow yourself to learn from them...but you are responsible for your own learning.
5.) Be kind to your environment.
Be kind not only to the trees and the grass but be kind to everything around you. Be kind to your home and clean up after yourself. Be kind to the friends that are around you and be kind to your family.
Nicole currently resides on Long Island, New York.
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Submitted by Mark Childs
"Jon,
You probably won't publish my rules, as I have not included the supporting details that most people do. But I wanted to let you know that your website has had a positive impact on me. When I found it in January, I typed out my five rules and have carried them around on a sheet of paper since. I refer to them often, especially when I am having a hard and stressful day. As you can see by the attached photo, they are well worn so it is probably time to print a new copy! Thanks for a great idea that makes a difference. I really enjoy reading everyone else's rules as well.
Cheers and continued success,
Mark"
...editor's note - Mark, many thanks for the positive feedback. And I am including your rules below!
Here are Mark's "Five Rules For Life":
______________________________
You probably won't publish my rules, as I have not included the supporting details that most people do. But I wanted to let you know that your website has had a positive impact on me. When I found it in January, I typed out my five rules and have carried them around on a sheet of paper since. I refer to them often, especially when I am having a hard and stressful day. As you can see by the attached photo, they are well worn so it is probably time to print a new copy! Thanks for a great idea that makes a difference. I really enjoy reading everyone else's rules as well.
Cheers and continued success,
Mark"
...editor's note - Mark, many thanks for the positive feedback. And I am including your rules below!
Here are Mark's "Five Rules For Life":
______________________________
Submitted by Cora Harrington
cora harrington works with homeless families at a local non-profit agency. she states that "four of the five [rules] are from friends and family, but they're things i live by and remember every single day."
Here are Cora's "Five Rules For Life":
1.) "You are responsible for your own happiness."
My friend Karen R. told me this when we went camping one weekend right after an "ex" dumped me. I'd just dropped out of grad school as well and was feeling like a Grade A-failure. Karen reminded me that happiness is a choice, and I'm the only person who can make myself happy.
2.) "Nobody has to live in your skin but you."
This one comes from my Dad, and he tells it to me all the time when I'm wavering on my principles or beliefs. My Dad never tells me what to think, he just reminds me that no matter what decisions I make, I'm the only person who has to deal the consequences - positive or negative.
3.) "Security is an illusion."
The artist and writer David Mack coined this one, and especially in this economy it's a quote I live by. So many people plan around having a secure future rather than a happy one that, when the rug is pulled out from under them,they have nothing left. This quote tells me to plan for happiness first, and if security follows it's an added bonus.
4.) "The two most important things in life are to be happy and to make other people happy."
This is another quote from my Dad who always told my Mom and I that the reason he works is so his family can be happy. My Dad taught me, by word and example, that making us happy makes him happy - and that's the kind of mindset I want to have in my relationships.
5.) "Everyday is a gift. Unwrap carefully."
The only quote on the list from me. I got a new appreciation for the preciousness of life after I came close to dying a couple of years ago. I don't take any day for granted and I try to live in such a way that I'll have no regrets.
Cora currently resides in Seattle, Washington.
______________________________
Here are Cora's "Five Rules For Life":
1.) "You are responsible for your own happiness."
My friend Karen R. told me this when we went camping one weekend right after an "ex" dumped me. I'd just dropped out of grad school as well and was feeling like a Grade A-failure. Karen reminded me that happiness is a choice, and I'm the only person who can make myself happy.
2.) "Nobody has to live in your skin but you."
This one comes from my Dad, and he tells it to me all the time when I'm wavering on my principles or beliefs. My Dad never tells me what to think, he just reminds me that no matter what decisions I make, I'm the only person who has to deal the consequences - positive or negative.
3.) "Security is an illusion."
The artist and writer David Mack coined this one, and especially in this economy it's a quote I live by. So many people plan around having a secure future rather than a happy one that, when the rug is pulled out from under them,they have nothing left. This quote tells me to plan for happiness first, and if security follows it's an added bonus.
4.) "The two most important things in life are to be happy and to make other people happy."
This is another quote from my Dad who always told my Mom and I that the reason he works is so his family can be happy. My Dad taught me, by word and example, that making us happy makes him happy - and that's the kind of mindset I want to have in my relationships.
5.) "Everyday is a gift. Unwrap carefully."
The only quote on the list from me. I got a new appreciation for the preciousness of life after I came close to dying a couple of years ago. I don't take any day for granted and I try to live in such a way that I'll have no regrets.
Cora currently resides in Seattle, Washington.
______________________________
Submitted by Marelisa Fábrega
marelisa fábrega blogs about creativity, productivity, and simplifying your life. She is the author of "How to Be More Creative - A Handbook for Alchemists".
she writes - "I chose five guiding principles for my life and then selected quotes which I feel reflect these principles for inclusion in your list of five rules for life."
Here are Marelisa's "Five Rules For Life":
1.) Be yourself, live life your own way, and follow your authentic desires.
"When your authentic self miraculously awakens and becomes stronger than your ego, then you will truly begin to make a difference in this world. You will literally enter into a partnership with the creative principle."
- Andrew Cohen
2.) Cultivate inner peace.
"He who lives in harmony with himself lives in harmony with the universe."
- Marcus Aurelius
3.) Live in a constant state of gratitude for everything that has been given to you.
"There is not a more pleasing exercise of the mind than gratitude. It is accompanied with such an inward satisfaction that the duty is sufficiently rewarded by the performance."
- Joseph Addison
4.) Celebrate life every day in some way. Make happiness and play a priority.
"A philosophy of life: I’m an adventurer, looking for treasure."
– Paolo Coehlo
5.) Be responsible for the talent that has been entrusted you. Be of service and create value for others.
"Your talent is God's gift to you. What you do with it is your gift back to God."
- Leo Buscaglia
Marelisa currently resides in the Republic of Panama.
______________________________
she writes - "I chose five guiding principles for my life and then selected quotes which I feel reflect these principles for inclusion in your list of five rules for life."
Here are Marelisa's "Five Rules For Life":
1.) Be yourself, live life your own way, and follow your authentic desires.
"When your authentic self miraculously awakens and becomes stronger than your ego, then you will truly begin to make a difference in this world. You will literally enter into a partnership with the creative principle."
- Andrew Cohen
2.) Cultivate inner peace.
"He who lives in harmony with himself lives in harmony with the universe."
- Marcus Aurelius
3.) Live in a constant state of gratitude for everything that has been given to you.
"There is not a more pleasing exercise of the mind than gratitude. It is accompanied with such an inward satisfaction that the duty is sufficiently rewarded by the performance."
- Joseph Addison
4.) Celebrate life every day in some way. Make happiness and play a priority.
"A philosophy of life: I’m an adventurer, looking for treasure."
– Paolo Coehlo
5.) Be responsible for the talent that has been entrusted you. Be of service and create value for others.
"Your talent is God's gift to you. What you do with it is your gift back to God."
- Leo Buscaglia
Marelisa currently resides in the Republic of Panama.
______________________________
Submitted by Barney Matthews
barney is the head penguin keeper at tuxs.org, the chief snow tester at sk1.us, and believes that a chocolate chip cookie can make most things better.
he writes - "I would like to offer my submission to "Five Rules For Life"; I love reading your site and felt inspired to share my own rules. I'm afraid I am short changing you slightly with only three rules."
...editor's note - I enjoyed your three rules, so we will bend the rules!
Here are Barney's "Five Rules For Life":
1.) I can do anything.
In the words of Henry Ford - "Whether you think you can, or whether you think you cannot - you are right."
I believe that I can do anything. If you think you can't do something you will give up at the first hurdle because it validates what you thought. If you believe you can do something you will keep trying until you succeed.
2. See good.
"You see what you want to see".
I believe there is good in every person and every situation. When dealing with people, choose to see their good side. Every person has their little imperfections (including yourself), but if you dwell on them it just builds resentment. Instead focus on their positive attributes. Assume good intentions. If you think someone is being deliberately mean, consider another explanation - maybe they found out their granny was gravely ill, maybe you are being overly sensitive today yourself, or maybe they just didn't mean it the way it seems. Make a point to compliment people often. If you can't compliment just keep quiet. If a situation doesn't turn out the way you wanted, look for a way to turn it in to something good. Learn a lesson from it, find the unexpected opportunity, or be grateful that it wasn't worse.
3. Be kind.
As Google says - "Don't be evil."
Help others. It will make you feel good, the other person will appreciate it, and one day you may need help yourself. Don't hinder other people. Give credit where credit is due, take responsibility for your own actions, and keep your promises. Lastly share "I cans" with other people - make them feel like they can do anything too.
Barney currently resides in Vermont.
he writes - "I would like to offer my submission to "Five Rules For Life"; I love reading your site and felt inspired to share my own rules. I'm afraid I am short changing you slightly with only three rules."
...editor's note - I enjoyed your three rules, so we will bend the rules!
Here are Barney's "Five Rules For Life":
1.) I can do anything.
In the words of Henry Ford - "Whether you think you can, or whether you think you cannot - you are right."
I believe that I can do anything. If you think you can't do something you will give up at the first hurdle because it validates what you thought. If you believe you can do something you will keep trying until you succeed.
2. See good.
"You see what you want to see".
I believe there is good in every person and every situation. When dealing with people, choose to see their good side. Every person has their little imperfections (including yourself), but if you dwell on them it just builds resentment. Instead focus on their positive attributes. Assume good intentions. If you think someone is being deliberately mean, consider another explanation - maybe they found out their granny was gravely ill, maybe you are being overly sensitive today yourself, or maybe they just didn't mean it the way it seems. Make a point to compliment people often. If you can't compliment just keep quiet. If a situation doesn't turn out the way you wanted, look for a way to turn it in to something good. Learn a lesson from it, find the unexpected opportunity, or be grateful that it wasn't worse.
3. Be kind.
As Google says - "Don't be evil."
Help others. It will make you feel good, the other person will appreciate it, and one day you may need help yourself. Don't hinder other people. Give credit where credit is due, take responsibility for your own actions, and keep your promises. Lastly share "I cans" with other people - make them feel like they can do anything too.
Barney currently resides in Vermont.
Submitted by Cath Duncan
through her bottom-line bookclub, "resource miner," cath duncan offers accelerated learning programs for professionals who want to develop the "agile living strategies" for thriving in these turbulent times. you can follow cath’s blog and find her on twitter.
Here are Cath's "Five Rules For Life":
1.) Focus on who you want to BE, rather than what you want to have and do.
Much of our time is spent on trying to HAVE and DO more, and we tend to forget about the most important goal - who we’re BEING. Living a fulfilling life is about being who you want to be, not what you’re doing or having. Take some time to decide what adjectives you’d like people to use when they describe you, what essence or spirit you’d like to exude in everything you do, and how you’d like to be feeling. Focus on that and you’ll always know how to handle the doing and having in a way that feels good.
2.) Love your fear.
Most people think fear is a bad thing - especially in the world of personal development where people will often tell you to ignore or fight your fear. Your fear is on your side, trying to do a bunch of good stuff for you. It lets you know when there’s a threat, it shows you know what’s important to you, it points you to the gaps in your plans that still need to be filled, and it’s a confirmation that you’re growing. Fear is perfectly safe and healthy. So befriend your fear, have regular conversations with it, and start working with your fear to create the life you want.
3.) Focus on results, rather than rules.
You know all those rules you’ve been told you should follow in order to be successful and happy - they're all made up. Sure, some of them will get you great results, but some will get you lousy results and you’ll get sucked into a template life that’s confining and soul-destroying. So focus on results, rather than rules. When you find yourself thinking, "I have to do..." or "I should...", stop and ask yourself what results you want and what results following those rules would get you, and remind yourself that you can always change the rules or make up new ones that’ll get you the results you want.
4.) Always prioritise action and real-world feedback over perfect plans on paper.
We’ve all been taught to plan and prepare and analyze, and to only step forward with action once we’re certain we can do that thing perfectly. We’ve been punished for being spontaneous and there are back-row critics surrounding us on all sides, waiting to pounce as soon as we make a mistake. But there are things we can learn in the real world that we can never learn in the world of imagination and analysis. And you’ll learn faster, be more relevant, and create better results when you step into learning in the real world. So, rather than trying to figure it all out on paper and in your head before you take any action, prioritise taking action in the real world - where you can get real-world feedback and learn, tweak, and adjust your strategy until you’re where you want to be.
5.) Change your mind on a regular basis.
Most of us have been brought up to believe that changing your mind is a fickle thing, but that’s often just other people’s way of trying to maintain the status quo so that they aren’t placed in the sort of position where they might have to grow and change too. The only way you’ll ever change your results is if you change your thinking. So be willing to challenge your own thoughts, stories, and rules to unearth and dissolve your assumptions.
Cath currently resides in London, United Kingdom.
______________________________
Here are Cath's "Five Rules For Life":
1.) Focus on who you want to BE, rather than what you want to have and do.
Much of our time is spent on trying to HAVE and DO more, and we tend to forget about the most important goal - who we’re BEING. Living a fulfilling life is about being who you want to be, not what you’re doing or having. Take some time to decide what adjectives you’d like people to use when they describe you, what essence or spirit you’d like to exude in everything you do, and how you’d like to be feeling. Focus on that and you’ll always know how to handle the doing and having in a way that feels good.
2.) Love your fear.
Most people think fear is a bad thing - especially in the world of personal development where people will often tell you to ignore or fight your fear. Your fear is on your side, trying to do a bunch of good stuff for you. It lets you know when there’s a threat, it shows you know what’s important to you, it points you to the gaps in your plans that still need to be filled, and it’s a confirmation that you’re growing. Fear is perfectly safe and healthy. So befriend your fear, have regular conversations with it, and start working with your fear to create the life you want.
3.) Focus on results, rather than rules.
You know all those rules you’ve been told you should follow in order to be successful and happy - they're all made up. Sure, some of them will get you great results, but some will get you lousy results and you’ll get sucked into a template life that’s confining and soul-destroying. So focus on results, rather than rules. When you find yourself thinking, "I have to do..." or "I should...", stop and ask yourself what results you want and what results following those rules would get you, and remind yourself that you can always change the rules or make up new ones that’ll get you the results you want.
4.) Always prioritise action and real-world feedback over perfect plans on paper.
We’ve all been taught to plan and prepare and analyze, and to only step forward with action once we’re certain we can do that thing perfectly. We’ve been punished for being spontaneous and there are back-row critics surrounding us on all sides, waiting to pounce as soon as we make a mistake. But there are things we can learn in the real world that we can never learn in the world of imagination and analysis. And you’ll learn faster, be more relevant, and create better results when you step into learning in the real world. So, rather than trying to figure it all out on paper and in your head before you take any action, prioritise taking action in the real world - where you can get real-world feedback and learn, tweak, and adjust your strategy until you’re where you want to be.
5.) Change your mind on a regular basis.
Most of us have been brought up to believe that changing your mind is a fickle thing, but that’s often just other people’s way of trying to maintain the status quo so that they aren’t placed in the sort of position where they might have to grow and change too. The only way you’ll ever change your results is if you change your thinking. So be willing to challenge your own thoughts, stories, and rules to unearth and dissolve your assumptions.
Cath currently resides in London, United Kingdom.
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